Expectation - The Silent Killer
Expectation... such as a great and powerful word. Most of us desire our outlooks not only fulfilled but exceeded. And why not? After all, don't I have got the right to anticipate what I want, how I desire it, when I desire it, and in the precise mode I desire it?
Sure you do! In fact, we all do! The job come ups in when you seek to enforce your outlooks - great and otherwise - on person else. Your boyfriend, your partner, or your husband, for instance. Here's where you get wading in cloudy waters.
While you can share your hopes, dreams, and desires with another, you can't coerce them into obedient compliance. Okay, well you can if you're running the military programme in your relationship!
But any usage of forceful persuasion goes controlling. And once you're exerting control over your mate, you're no longer allowing him to be free in making picks that are in alliance with his truth and support his growth.
You may believe you don't really care about this, but I can guarantee you that if you are not creating a dynamical in which you're both free to show and unrecorded according to your truth, your human relationship is headed for doomsday and gloom.
Sure, you desire your cat to make whatever you desire him to make and you desire to be able to anticipate that. If he truly is on the same page as you in this respect and the country concerned, then he most likely volition ran into your expectations.
But if he's doing what you desire out of a false sense of duty and simply not to incur your wrath, then he is not being his true self, and sooner or later, things will fall apart.
You see, any clip you enforce your material on person else and do them experience that they would honour it if they loved you, you are manipulating them, and certainly not coming from love yourself. Just as you desire to go and be whole, you desire your adult male to go and be whole as your equal partner.
Denigrating him to a place in which he cannot rise to his higher ego actually maintains you both low, staccato and incomplete. Sure you desire understanding in your relationship, but not at the cost of sacrificing his or your truth.
This also put you up for dependence and co-dependency, somes state in which you necessitate him to carry through your demands whether they're realistic or not, and you fall into desolation when he doesn't. He then desires to ran into your demands to forestall this dark state, and experiences terribly guilty when he doesn't.
It's a Lose-Lose proposition. You lose sight of who you really are and neglect to authorise yourself with that Higher Truth. He loses his ability to believe for himself and turn accordingly. You both lose the chance to come up from love and share love with each other.
My suggestion is that you put all your outlooks on yourself and promote your cat to make the same for himself. That way, you can individually and together both "shoot for the stars!"
In Loving Light,
Dr. Pamela
Labels: co dependency, control, dependency, desires, empowerment, expectation, growth, love, relationship, truth